I got my class 3A driving license 5 years ago. I was co-erced into it. The hubby killed my passion 10 years ago just because I passed the final theory and he failed. Then 2 years down the road when he passed, he slow-talked me into taking the dreaded test again.
Of course by that time, my Final Theory has expired, all fiery passions have gone and I was as resentful as ever. Especially since the MIL has forked out $2000 cash for me to "chase my dreams". I didn't really have the heart to tell her that my dreams consisted of nightmares involving me driving naked around the circuit and failing the practical test because I use the poles that guide the parallel parking thing to hang my laundry - hence the driving naked bit.
Oh, the final theory? That's chicken feed. I aced it the second time round as I thought I could. It's the practical test that I'm worried about.
So I coudn't sleep for weeks leading up to the dreaded day. I was afraid I'd fail. Failure means more money to fork out because there'll be an extra 6 lessons to go through and the test fees as well. Failure would mean enduring the noise that would emit from the hubby who will never let me hear the end of it.
Anyway, I passed with 14 points. Ok. fair enough although the tester seemed unhappy at me for passing because all he said when he handed my results was "Pass", then added gruffly "Drive carefully hor.."
That was an experience I didn't wish to repeat again. However, for all the co-ercing, holier than thou barking he did whenever I reverse-parked too slowly, or his constant nagging over my driving, my husband actually let me have the steering wheel. Although I did tell him that I will not drive if I can help it with him within the confines of the car. I'd rather drive alone. After all these years, he accepted it. He even accepted it when I said "I'm not driving if you're going to spoil my day". So, at least there's a quiet agreement there. But somehow I'm lucky that I can at least touch the steering wheel.
It doesn't seemed the same to two of my friends.
Friend "A" had her license for years but have not even set foot on the pedal. Not once. She only said one word when I asked and that is "phobia". She ever called one night asking if I'd like to go to work with her the next day because her hubby is not working so no one is sending her to work. I thought she's giving me a lift since the car will not be used by hubby.
But no, nothing of that sort. I am to be her 'kaki' because she got no friend to take the bus with her to work. Hello..I take the bus to work everyday and I go alone. I don't need to set up a date to "go to work together" unless of course I'd get lost because I'm so used to sitting primly on the passenger side of the car that I forgot how to walk alone.
Friend "B" had hers a few years before mine but after her stories about her adventures at the driving circuit and finally having the license to her name, she has not so much as touched the steering wheel - yet.
This same friend smirked at me when I said I drove to work (sometimes because i have to - yup, kena forced again) because she kept preaching the I-prefer-to-take-public
transport-because-it's-cheaper-and-I'll-reach-home-faster" theory. I'd rather call it "jealousy"....*whistles*
Both friends have something in common. Their hubbies fetch them to and from work. And I have a strong hunch that both friends are financing their cars out of their own paychecks as well which is sad because it's like you're buying the cake but you couldn't eat it.
Friend B had it a step further. When speed traps kept capturing her car plate number because her hubby likes to drive fast - I mean really fast and hubby's points are close to suspension, that's when her license came into full use.
Her name is used and she got the demerits. No points for guessing who insisted on Friend B to take her driving license in the first place. How clever! She didn't have to bother about remembering everything taught in driving school because she will never get to sit on the driver's seat. Ever. How convenient! Although she didn't exactly tell me about "taking the license out of convenience" bit, the part about her undeserved demerits is enough and I'm damn sure I'm close to my theory.
Oh, Friend B did mention that she will eventually drive, like, in an emergency.
Huh? You know, if it's an emergency, I'd hail a cab and rely on the driver to take me to, say, the hospital directly in front of A&E in super record time. In an emergency, I couldn't be frantically driving in a panic along the expressway (on a dark, stormy night!!) and dumping my passenger to find his/her way in the A&E while I swear and curse around the parking lot trying to find a decent spot. Oh please, be logical. I know I'm stupid but not that stupid.
Another friend (who drives) did mention that men are selfish creatures sometimes. They forgot who helped them to finance their dream cars and refused to let their wives drive.
They're too lazy to re-adjust the seats and mirrors. They'll be too busy wondering if their scatterbrained wives would leave the internal lights on and waste batteries. They'll be wondering if the wives would mess the car's mileage (and value) although it's only for a short trip to the local petrol station to pump a few litres more because there happened to be an islandwide petrol discount that day. Their egos would be bruised to the point of bleeding if their friends saw them in the passenger seat or god forbid, sitting there helplessly while wifey tried to do a three point turn at a small 2-way lane behind Joo Chiat complex.
It's a lot alike in a way. This wife bullying. Some obvious, some not so glaring. But still, it's how you make of the situation and how you deal with it that's important. An ustaz once said that God test us because He knows we're strong. The test will make us stronger. The tears is for us alone and it cleanses our soul.
So to the girls out there, stay strong because the guys may crow that we're the weaker sex, but technically, they don't know shit about giving birth, juggling 10 different things at the same time and giving up everything just to save their boyfriends'/husbands' butts.
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